Yes, I watch American Idol. I do. I've been hurt many, many times from it. It's caused many, many wars in my family. My elder brother and I haven't spoken since the Taylor Hicks debacle.
Yet, I am still a fan. I don't know why. I wish I could stop. There should be a support group.
Until I overcome this addiction...I thought I might give a weekly rundown. We're down to the top 9, so I'm a little behind the game...but, so what?
Tonight's show featured any popular download on itunes! Holla! This left the contestants pretty much any avenue... to show us who they are as a contemporary artist...Here are my thoughts on tonight's show...in order of appearance, of course.
1. Anoop "Dawg" Desai.
I've never understood the draw behind Anoop. Tonight he sang Usher's 'Caught Up.' The only thing I was caught up in? His eyebrows. Even if I loved, loved, loved his voice and thought that he would put out an album I loved...I can't get past the eyebrows. It doesn't matter what he's singing, I feel like his eyebrows are doing all the talking. Also, I'm partially convinced that he's from a secret terrorist cell and is now going to get to the top two through other sleeper cell agent's votes and when the finale comes and Ryan is about to announce the winner of American Idol, season 8.... KABOOM. Bomb. Anoop was a suicide bomber. I wouldn't be buying tickets to the finale...I'm just saying.
2. Megan "I'm quirky and hot...is that enoough?" Joy.
Megan is my girl. I love her unique voice, I love her flava. But that girl is seriously tanking it! It's almost like she's not even trying anymore. I think she's in serious jeopardy. But, good news for Megan, she's smokin' hot! Even if this doesn't work out, I'm pretty sure she'll get by just fine with her looks. She sang a Bob Marley song. Yeah. I know. I was upset as you are.
3. Danny "I'm Grieving" Gokey.
Let me just put it out there that I love Danny's voice. And, granted, it's not his fault that the producers of AI make him seem like the holy one (the white Obama of music.) I love his voice, I do. Tonight, he sings 'What Hurts The Most' originally done by Rascal Flatts. It was ten times better than their version...not hard to do. And the judges praised it as the best of the night! (remember, this was only the 3rd performance of the night and compared to the first 2...it was the best of the night) When Rascal Flatts sings this song it always sounds a bit off. A bit out of tune, whiny, nasal sounding. Turns out...it's not just Rascal Flatts.
4. Allison "Clown Hair" Spanish last name.
She does have a great voice for a 16 year old. But her hair made her look like part clown/part troll. (take me to your leader) Allison sang 'Don't Speak' originally done by No Doubt. I have to say, I was digging it during the verse...but lost it in the chorus where she again tried to show us with every single note that she is a rocker and edgy! Don't you forget it!
5. Scott "Blind Guy" Mcintyre. (no relation to Ronnie Milsap or Stevie Wonder)
I like Scott's vibe. I think he's perfect for the Christian Gospel network. I can see him and Jim Brickman dueling it out for top Christian Christmas album. My favorite thing Scott says tonight: "I'm gonna strip things down a bit. Just me and the piano." Hmmm...sounds familiar...I want to call it...every other performance I've seen him give?
6. Matt "I wanna be Justin Timberlake including the tiny hats" Giraud.
Tonight he sang 'You Found Me' originally done by The Fray. It was a good version, nothing to write home about, nearly indistinguishable from the original. The thing that disturbed me the most was that he sang it, while playing the piano, in the middle of a crowd....like he's suddenly a superstar! I found that pretentious. All he needed was a tiny hat to complete the act.
7. Lil "Token Big Vocal Black Chick For This Season, Stay Tuned Next Season For Someone Strikingly Similar To Me" Rounds.
After much deliberation she chose 'I Surrender' by Celine Dion. I surrendered to my remote and fast forwarded through most of this. (You saw that one coming...it was too easy.) I just want to put this out there...there ain't nuttin' lil about her bum.
8. Adam "Wicked" Lambert.
I don't even know what to say. I truly don't. After every performance, I know that microphone begs to be sanitized. Between the lights and Adam's shrill screaming...by the end of the performance I felt like I might be having a seizure. I honestly, started calling 911 for help. Every performance of Adam's makes me feel like I am sitting there watching a wholesome show...and suddenly I realize it's turned into an awkward porno and they're making love to the camera and stripping off their clothes and doing pelvic thrusts towards the camera...and I'm watching it with my Grandma. I fear that Adam will be the next Prince for me. Kinda girly, not really a guy, not really a rocker...and I'll never understand it.
9. Kris "Who??? Allen.
Tonight he sang 'Ain't No Sunshine When She's Gone'....and there ain't no sunshine in my life when you're not in it, Kris! I think he nailed this performance....and then ruined it with that last falsetto note. Ick. Week to week, I pretty much forget about this dude, but I sure like him when he's on stage. He's the white man's Enrique Iglesias.
In a nutshell...nobody wowed me. I'm not hooked on any of them. I love Danny's and Megan's voices the best...but I definitely don't see Megan making it far, and my love for Danny is dwindling.
I fear we have another Clay/Reuben show down coming up.... by that I mean...
Don't know/Don't Care showdown. Yet I'll tune in next week. It's a sickness.