Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Bandits!!!

Sweet? lovable? Innocent?

I think not!

What am I speaking of? Children, of course! They pretend, they play a good game. But I see through their charade. They are bandits, robbers, thieves...

Every summer I go through this. I'm minding my own business, driving home (or to the store, or to work, or to the liquor store...you get the point...I was driving, minding my own business) when suddenly one of these little pipsqueaks step out from their sidewalk holding a sign, "lemonade for sell!"

Some of them even go so far as to say, "lemonade for sell, please stop or I will not be able to feed my family tonight!"

Okay, maybe they don't say that, but they might as well. I feel guilty all the same. And I am always compelled to stop. I can't help myself. I must stop. I never drink the lemonade. No way. You never know what those devious little creatures put in the lemonade. Maybe an addictive agent...so I come back again and again and pay 12 times the actual cost of the lemonade.

These evil genius tykes are amazing. And I am an enabler. I stop every time and pay a ridiculous price for a cup of lemonade and then pour it out as soon as I am out of sight.

These kids are never gonna learn to go get a real job. You know who they grow up to be? The bums on the side of the road with signs asking for help/money/food...but they don't even offer jacked up lemonade anymore! They offer nothing in return for the money you give them...those lemonade stand kids grow up and figure out how to bamboozle you out of money without offering anything in return! They are good...so good...and I am a foolish enabler...

They are bandits! For your own safety, watch out! It's a dangerous world.

4 comments:

Monkey Toe Momma said...

So! They Got You Too! The wee beasties! ;)

the Cheerful Optimist said...

have a little faith and try their lemonade, it might be the sweetest thing you ever tasted.

Rae said...

Gee, I didn't even know that kids tried that scheme any more! I guess they don't down here, maybe because it's too darn hot for even those little schemers to be out. Any way stay strong and try to pass at least one by, make them work for your bussiness by washing your windshield, then they'll be prepared for later in life.

Lonna said...

You know Lisa, I never had a bit of trouble passing by the tycons of the future until I was with you one day and you were nearly in tears to see these little tykes out peddling their wares. Apparently being the Mother of 5, they had little affect on me. Now thanks to you and your 'seeing the world through sweeter eyes', I now have to stop and buy some horrid lemonade and I don't even like it.