So, this morning I woke up and got in the shower. (yes, it was at ten in the morning...don't judge me!)
I'm washing my hair and suddenly I notice a disfiguring red mark on my arm!!! It's a spider bite! It must be! There are no other possible explanations. (yes, I'm aware that I frequently break out in mysterious bumps and/or hives, but I'm sure this one is a spider bite.)
You can see for yourself. It's hideous and disfiguring. And it's totally going to destroy my bracelet modeling career. Great! What's next? How much more can I take? These bitches are good. They are wearing down my mental and emotional health. (let's face it, it wasn't a hard task.) I don't think this is a deadly spider wound, although I am not a doctor, so I can't say for sure. I think they sent a benign spider to see if it could even be successful in getting through my defenses. Well, it was successful. And I know what's coming next! The head honcho is going to come finish me off!!! I've loved you all and will miss you.