Friday, July 18, 2008

Deep thoughts and pimping...




In happy and exciting news....the 'shoe carnival' is in town!!! Yippee!!! I've never been to a shoe carnival. I don't know if they make the shoes perform. Is there a bearded lady shoe? A midget shoe? Two headed shoe??? I don't know, but the possibilities seem endless!!! I'm gonna get me some cotton candy and watch the shoes entertain me! It's located where the old Pier One used to be. I don't know why it would be in a retail store environment? Usually carnivals are in a big top tent! Maybe they should get some pointers from Ringling Brothers...

I'm 27 and as far as I'm aware, I've been eating my whole life. I can't say for sure because those first few months are a little blurry...but I think I have. I haven't always had teeth and had to chew my food, but again, it's been a long while of me doing that as well. So, my question is...if I've been eating for approximately 27 years...how do I just all of the sudden bite my lip or cheek when eating? What happens? Who was in charge of keeping my massive lips out of the way while chewing? I think I put Pedro in charge of that....slacker...he's totally canned. I bit my lip the other day and now it hurts all of the time. What was Pedro thinking? He was probably busy keeping the tongue out of the way of my teeth and neglected the lip thinking someone else was on it. Idioto! (That's spanish for 'idiot.' Pedro only speaks spanish. Maybe that was the problem...)

I find it a curious thing when babies go to the doctor for their check ups. I think babies should have check ups...I just think the information their parents come out with is funny. I find it funny that the doctors rate them according to percentages. Oh, your baby is the 77th percentile in height and the 23rd for weight. I am SO glad doctors don't do that! I don't want to hear, "Well Lisa, you're
1431 weeks old now! You're in the 12th percentile for height and the 476th percentile for weight! Lay off the formula! You don't need to eat every 2 hours, you haven't needed to eat every two hours since you were 12 weeks old. We'll see you in a month!"




One final thought:

Is it just me or does it seem a little presumptuous to name your child 'Joy'? How do you know they'll be joyful? How do you know that they'll be a joy to talk to? You don't. I think that should be for the rest of us to decide. You don't see me changing my name to Beautiful, Perfect or Funny...do you? And all of those apply. I think my first child will be named 'Spectacular!!!' (exclamation points will be a part of his/her name. I think the name could go to either gender...)

That's it from me this week! Enjoy!

8 comments:

Lonna said...

First of all Lisa, the shoe circus only has a side show of the two tongue shoe, and the heeless shoe. and for the especially brave....the tongue tied shoe!!!! (It's really a lasso tied shoe, but no need to get specific.)
As for your 'pimp'advertisment....well I never!

the Cheerful Optimist said...

Oh, OH !!!! so much to comment about. Lisa you have a mind that never ends. How you think of so many things, boggles my mind. I really appreciate your thoughts and wittiness. It always brightens my day. How one can bite their lip after all the years of practice I will never know. However, I have bitten my lip or cheek more than I care to remember. What I don't understand that once you bite your lip or cheek, you invariably bite it again and sometimes a third time. WHY????
At the risk of being laugh at, possibly shot at sun rise, probably is an 'old wives tale', a great way to help heal the wound in your mouth is to rinse your mouth a couple of times with salt water. This seems to ease the pain and improve the healing. Just a thought!!!!

Bryan said...

Another great way to help your mouth is to wash it out with soap. Especially after that pg-13 post. Wow, your link status is in official probation. Very funny, but still.........You will be notified of the decision on your blog.

PrincessLisa said...

Mama- thank you, I knew you would know more about the shoe carnival!

Kenny...I am with you on this one! I don't understand why we bite them and then why we keep biting them. It's horrible! Thanks for the tip! :)

Bryan- go ahead and take me out! PG-13?!?!?!?! Ridiculous! I must stand by my creative rights. I cannot and will not be censored! Especially when we feel it was G rated, considering the current rating standards. We'll notify you of OUR decision to continue allowing you to read this blog.

Brandon said...

PG-13? Hot! wait...I don't see partial nudity or any non-sexual "F" words. No graphic violence. I'm calling the MPAA, this PG-13 blog sucks.

The MPAA said...

We hereby rate this blog a very bland PG.

FYI, a PG-13 motion picture may go beyond the PG rating in theme, violence, nudity, sensuality, language, adult activities or other elements, but does not reach the restricted R category. The theme of the motion picture by itself will not result in a rating greater than PG-13, although depictions of activities related to a mature theme may result in a restricted rating for the motion picture. Any drug use will initially require at least a PG-13 rating. More than brief nudity will require at least a PG-13 rating, but such nudity in a PG-13 rated motion picture generally will not be sexually oriented. There may be depictions of violence in a PG-13 movie, but generally not both realistic and extreme or persistent violence. A motion picture’s single use of one of the harsher sexually-derived words, though only as an expletive, initially requires at least a PG-13 rating. More than one such expletive requires an R rating, as must even one of those words used in a sexual context.

Seeing none of the above, we feel it necessary to rate this blog accordingly...before we fall asleep from boredom. *snore*

Rae said...

I just don't know what you did but I kept getting a warning that your blog might contain some things not recommended, and might even be rated x. Besides that it just kept disappearing from my screen. It must really be HOT!

Elise said...

BTW- I DID invite you. i daid you should come visit me in NM. Why not, I say? Is your job THAT important that you cannot rekindle a once-important relationship with your coolest cousin. You could meet her children. Anyway though, I am going to be in Pooh-tah in like two weeks, though carless, you could come see me In PG!!!!! Bustah! Or come pick me up. Yo daddy said I justyhad to call, and he would come get me.